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Bro Saeed's avatar

💯 percent

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Nailah Dean's avatar

Thank you for addressing this topic! It’s an important one! I do think it’s a little oversimplified for us to say a better wali will prevent divorces… I think there’s something really wrong with the current crop of men. They enter and exit marriages so quickly… the solution must begin and end with them.

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Abdul-Malik Merchant's avatar

BarakAllahuFeekm!

I completely agree. While this paper is written as a warning to my sisters, it is really addressing men. While I genuinely believe men and women are interdependent, and therefore both have growth areas due to a myriad of factors, I’m trying to do my part to educate and mentor men to be better.

If you’re interested in this, please the Chivalry tab on the homepage (https://www.khawatir.blog/s/chivalry).

Nonetheless, any and all feedback, criticisms, and suggestions are welcome!

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Nailah Dean's avatar

Oh thank you! I'll check that tab out.

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Ala The Heartist's avatar

Salam Imam, thank you for this detailed and thorough breakdown of the importance of wali. I have a few reflections questions.

What if the Wali, barely knows their daughter and doesn’t actually fully understand her or her needs in marriage? At that point would he really be supporting her for success?

Also, if a woman was previously married and divorced, is it required for her to have a wali?

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Abdul-Malik Merchant's avatar

Salam! Allah bless you.

In an ideal world, either the Wali would defer his authority to another family member or the woman would go to a judge to get his authority deferred. The ultimate goal is insuring the woman’s best interests are cared for.

There’s a difference of opinion about a woman who’s divorced, but some of the Madhhabs allow it.

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